I’m writing this to my friends who are struggling but don’t want to talk to me. As far as I know, I’ve done nothing to upset them. We’ve always talked openly in the past. There’s no doubt, they are literally avoiding me. So I’ll say it here. Forgive yourself, or forgive me, and start over. We’re all human, we make mistakes. And you’ll probably have to keep forgiving yourself (or me), because it’s hard to change. It’s about trying. It takes practice. It doesn’t happen overnight. The important thing is that you are intending to be a good person, not that you always are.
Or….. forgive the other, the source of the problem. Hate and resentment eat YOU up inside, not THEM. They’re human, too. Be angry, have a ritual, have a good cry, and then every time you’re feeling bad about it, again, think of something happy instead. I think of my babies, puppies, kid goat yoga, chocolate silk pie, some ongoing fantasy. It can be easier to train yourself to think of something good instead of beating yourself up with don’t, don’t, don’t think about it.
Also, there’s no denying, you’ve got to talk about it. Talk with a trusted friend (or professional) about your problems. If you’re trying, there’s no need for shame or guilt. I know it’s hard, awful, awkward, painful – the first steps always are. It takes practice! I love you and would never intentionally hurt you. That doesn’t mean it won’t be painful, but it’s a necessary pain, like ripping the bandage off, or putting the arm back in the socket. Aren’t you already in pain? Pain that doesn’t seem to be resolving anything? Why aren’t you talking to me about it? More importantly, why aren’t you talking to me at all?
There’s a medicine to heal that doesn’t cost a thing. It’s enormously successful at reducing pain. You can use it anywhere, any time – it’s meditation. But most of my friends say they have tried and they’re unable to meditate. Yes, most!
Reiki is a great introduction to meditation, in addition to its healing energy. There is absolutely nothing expected of you. You can learn to breathe, relax, and heal. It takes practice. We’re not good at most things right from the start.